Men's Cologne Spray

"A full and heavy moon arises over the brick and mortar buildings. What once was busy and teeming with life in the dark has become silent and strange as you work undercover of the night to seek out rumors of dark spirits haunting the alleyways. From a distance, you hear the eerie cry of a lone wolf, the sound raising the hairs on the back of your neck. You turn to follow the sound, and in an instant, you also hear the scuff of a footstep behind you. 

Whirling around with sword at the ready, you do not expect to see a man in a perfect suit, a black bowler hat at a rakish angle in a fine case, leaning upon a dark cane. He smiles at you, and while such an expression ought to be welcoming, his teeth seem far too sharp. 

"My dear young hero," he begins lazily. "You've made a rookie mistake in persuing your prey this late night." He takes a deep breath, nostrils flaring. "I can smell them. Those dark phthalate spirits and it seems to me that your cologne was a dupe; there's not a single enchanting thing about it. Really now, have you not heard of the Wizards fantastical cologne for men?" 

You cautiously step back, shaking your head. What's his angle? What does he mean about cologne for men?

"Tsk, tsk," he tuts at you. "Then allow me to present to you an advantage. Here," he tosses you what looks like a spray bottle without blinking, and deftly you catch it. 

A quick look at it reveals it is from that legendary company sweeping the land, this Fable Beard Co, and it is a cologne. 

"This, my young hunter, shall rid you of those dark phthalates and DHT-inhibiting spirits that cling to you and give your position away, and the scent will last as long or longer than a full night of chasing your mark. I recommend that you no longer purchase shady men's cologne spray from dubious sources, and as always, consider pairing this powerful cologne for men with other iconic Fable beard Co. products for the ultimate glorious beard and body care." 

While he speaks, you find yourself blinded by his gloriously sleek, shimmering blond beard, finding it impossible to look away. As you blink, this strange figure is gone! Leaving you wondering if it was a dream in the dark, but for the lingering phrase in your head that tells you, you'll see him again as another howl at the moon makes your skin pebble."