Scribe Journal Entry 371: Beard Growth Elixir

Scribe Journal Entry 371

Saturday, July 16

“Today was a rather productive day at the grand library in Ostricester. I was perusing the historical archives and I came across some strange early writings. The writings spoke of myths told by ancient peoples. These myths were fanciful and strange but something odd stuck out to me. Almost all of the tales spoke of mighty bearded beings who each possessed an unique magical elixir. 

Supposedly these beings protect these elixirs by commanding some of the remarkable beards ever before grown. These beards give them spectacular powers. It is also prophesied that a mighty hero, of true and brave heart, would collect the three elixirs and grow the ultimate beard in all reality. 

I showed this to the Wizard who was most intrigued by this. He began speculating at what would be in the elixir. He believed that surely this mixture would contain vitamins such as A, C, D, B6, and Magnesium, along with Thiamin, Niacin, Zinc, and Folate. This would increase blood flow to the beard follicles. It would also have a litany of amino acids such as L-Alanine, L-Lysine, L-Leucine, L-Cystine, and Hyaluronic Acid; to increase beard growth and skin health. The elixir would also have to include a ridiculous amount of Biotin, somewhere around 10,000 mcg!

As scientifically inclined as I am, I had no idea what he was talking about. It is probably some magic of which I am unlearned. He seems to believe that these elixirs could actually exist. Being a learned historian, I do not believe that these elixirs have basis in reality, however, due to my previous adventures I would say that anything is possible. We will see what develops as the Wizard did seem to take an interest in the elixirs.”

Narrated by Brandon Warner