Wizard's Journal Entry #417

Wizard’s Journal Entry #417

Thursday, July 21

“Dear Journal,

As I have dedicated my life to the betterment of this universe through the study of the glorious and manly beard, I realize that attaining the peak beard potential in each and every heroic soul, requires a great commitment by each grower. A beard care regiment of washing, conditioning, oiling, buttering, and combing must be followed to get the most out of the beardsman’s follicles. Wooden combs and other gadgets are used to groom and primp the beard to give the beard the perfect “look.” Razors and trimmers help prune the beard so that the wild beard may be tamed and trained into a handsome force that grips the hearts of lovely lasses everywhere.

I turn now to that which sustains the beardsman, well what, in fact, sustains every person in the Fableverse and beyond: food. A beardsman’s beard is made of fats and proteins, therefore the diet of a beardsman with a spectacular beard must also contain fats and proteins. A beard also is also heavily reliant on Vitamins B 3,5, and 9 in particular. This means a diet with lean meats, nuts, egg yolks, milk, and leafy greens. Meats like salmon, beef, oysters, clams, mussels, chicken, turkey, and pork can help a beard grow strong. Spinach, collard greens, turnip greens, and romaine lettuce are high in B5 and B9 content. Liver and organ meats, milk, and legumes are also great sources of folates. These foods will help advance the gain of any serious beardsman. I will continue to study the nutrients needed to build a beard of excellence as I continue the study of the beard.” 

Narrated by Brandon Warner