🔥🚛 Hitchhiker – Beard Wash
Birch Tar | Extinguished Smoke | Rain-Soaked Grass
He went up in flames on a forgotten stretch of highway—but the road didn’t let him go. Now, the Hitchhiker rides again, a smoldering echo of rubber and rage. You won’t hear him coming, but you’ll smell the warning: smoke, ash, and the ghost of a storm-soaked field.
This isn’t just a beard wash—it’s a ritual of resurrection. A cleansing blend of smoky birch tar, extinguished fire, and fresh-cut grass soaked in rain, designed for those who don’t stop at “dead end.”
💀 Scent Profile:
Birch Tar – Bold and bitter, like burned tires and smoldering vengeance
Extinguished Smoke – Ashy, hot, and heavy with the memory of fire
Rain-Soaked Grass – Earthy and cool, a reminder of where the crash ended—and where he began
💪 What’s Included:
1 x 8oz Beard Wash – A powerful roadside purifier built to scrub away sweat, soot, and the past you can’t outrun.
💥 Benefits:
✔ Strengthens Beard Integrity – For beards that survive the flames
✔ Deep Hydration – Cleans without stripping the soul—or natural oils
✔ Long-Lasting Fragrance – A haunting blend that lingers like smoke in your rearview
✔ Softens Beard Hairs – Leaves your beard smooth, controlled, and crash-tested
✔ Gentle Yet Powerful – Tough on grime, soft on skin—perfect for the undead and unbothered
✔ Soothes Skin Beneath – Even when the road gets rough and the night grows colder
⚗️ Ingredients & Benefits:
Water – The base of rebirth
Decyl Glucoside – Coconut-based cleanser for gentle but deep cleansing
Xanthan Gum – Creates the perfect lather to wash away ghostly residue
Aloe Vera Powder – Calms the wreckage under your beard
Lauryl Betaine – Powers through grime like a rig through rain
Citric Acid – Balances skin as the storm rolls in
Castor Oil – Adds ghostly sheen and resilience
Sweet Almond Oil – Hydrating enough to outlast a firestorm
Coconut Oil – Softens even the most scorched bristle
Jojoba Oil – Restores order to your haunted mane
Argan Oil – Repairs what the flames tried to take
Fragrance Oil – IFRA-compliant, skin-safe, and fire-forged
Fable’s Risk-Free Guarantee
If Hitchhiker doesn’t haunt your senses—or the scent doesn’t take you on a ride you won’t forget—we’ll exchange it. No questions asked.
🚛 Smell Burnt. Ride Again. Become Hitchhiker.
Only from Fable Beard Co.—crafted for the damned who still roam the road.
